How to feel glamorous after you've just picked up dog poop in your living room for the second time in 24 hours

Take a shower.  It has been 3 days afterall.

Order this print you've been drooling over the last 2 months.

Drink another glass of milk.  This time accompanied by 5 oreos.  Not just 3.

Pretend you have tickets to an Outstanding In The Field dinner.  Look at the pretty pictures instead.  Continue dipping oreos into your milk glass.

Practice your speech you continue to plead to your husband about his need to switch your cell phone upgrade eligibility so you can get a new iphone and he can wait until summertime.  

Ignore the stinky grunts coming from your 20 month old who's hiding behind the couch.

Pretend you are a honey badger.


{Honey badger video found via The Bloggess.}